So, i hate my job. I own a business and I hate it. it affords us many luxuries but I hate it. I don't even work that much but I don't want anything to do with it. I love some of my customers and even became friends with them but I dont' even get to see them all the time because I'm never there. That's part of the problem. I want to be a good mom and stay home but me not being there causes problems that I have to deal with and I just hate dealing with them. I always admired people who had high paying jobs and left to pursue a dream job that may or may not pay them at all. Our business isn't even high paying, it's just enough to not be poor. I used to be a workaholic and thought that even if i had children, i'd be the bread winner and my husband would stay home and take care of the children. But the second I got pregnant and more so after holding my baby, I don't want to do anything but be with her, screaming or not.
I am thinking of selling my business which would help pay for more than half of our total loans including our mortgage which sounds good but A-man would have to get a job that would pay pretty well in order to pay off the rest of our debt and to maintain somewhat of the same lifestyle. and since he plans on doing something on his own, he wouldn't have health insurance so I was thinking of getting a job with a company that offers full medical benefits to their PART time employees, so far Starbucks and Trader Joe's are good contenders. The only catch is that I keep thinking about getting a job and running into my current customers and feeling embarrassed. That is typical me. I fantasize about scenarios that are totally ridiculous, i think it's the cultural, showing face issue, that i grew up with. which i don't really care about but i guess i do in a small scale.
anyways, besides us all being sick, that's whats been keeping me busy at nights. if it does happen, it won't be until this summer when i know how A-man's side business is going and when Elle is old enough for me to be gone for longer periods of time.
If I do plan on selling the business, I have to do it this year because my landlord will only give a 5 year lease to the new owners. A potential buyer will definitely want AT LEAST 5 years, usually 10. but any less would not generate a sale. The problem is that we arent' really ready to sell this year because A-man needs to get his dream business off the ground which may not take off or it would at least take some time. He is highly employable so he CAN get a job but part of the reason we bought this business was because it would allow us to pursue our dream job someday.
I wish health insurance wasn't so expensive but so does the rest of the country. Currently we are paying $450 just for the 2 of us and it just increased to $560 and I haven't gotten the premium update for adding Elle so that will probably be another $100+ a month. I just can't afford that but of course we have to keep paying. Since the birth of our baby we have been so much better about budgeting our money. We never really went out socially but we did eat out a LOT but not anymore and we could cut other things out if we needed to. I just have to be creative soon and figure out what we can do to keep everyone happy.
Will work for health insurance
Saturday, January 19, 2008 | at 5:29 PM |
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3 comments:
You brought this topic up on the board and I've said a lot about it already, so I won't repeat everything, but here goes anyway.
I totally understand where you're coming from and really do hope that you and hubby are able to achieve your goals and are able to financially sustain your lifestyle while being able to be w/ Elle.
Health insurance is about $900/mo for us, it's just ridiculous. It started out lower, but the premium increases every few months, and we basically have no say. The weird thing is, we don't really use it. It's mainly for the JIC and emergency situations. Maternity isn't even covered so I don't know why it's so damn much! :(
Hubby and I made lots of sacrifices for me to be a SAHM. We've had so many set backs in the last 2 1/2 years, mainly related to my mom's involvement. We're trying to get back on our feet, but it's tough.
I really hope things work out w/ you and your family.
Oh, I wanted to add, we're looking into getting just the bare minimum emergency health insurance to lower our bills, for hubby and I and leaving it the same for our girls. Hopefully that'll bring our payments down a little, although from the options that we've seen so far, it's not much.
You'd think w/ all the taxes we pay in this country, we shouldn't have to worry so much about health insurance and health costs. :( It really is a huge burden.
Health insurance is definitely a pain in the butt.
Hope it all works out for you and your family!
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