I can't do it. It fucking sucks. I let her cry a little for her morning nap after she woke up as soon as I left the room. But after about 10 minutes, I went in to find her room stinking with poop. She had poohed in her diaper and since she's mostly potty trained, I know she was crying for me to take her to the bathroom. I felt like the worst mom in the world so I don't know if I can stick to this. Plus reading yesterday's post was harsh even for me and I fucking wrote it! She'll eventually sleep on her own, right?
On the brighter side, she is learning to fall asleep even without nursing. A few times I nursed her before her nap and even if she woke up I put her in her crib and just stood over her and waited until she went to sleep. She would never have done that. But last night she kept waking up as soon as I started to leave the room, fucking creaky ass floors (I need to move but that's a whole different post), so I just stayed in her room for an hour.
She still woke up a few times last night as usual but I do feel like we're making progress. But I'm not sure if watching her cry in the same room is any better than letting her cry without me there. This sucks. It really does. I wish I had the strength and the stamina to carry her and rock her to sleep every time.
I'm not giving up but I am losing hope.
Day Two
Friday, November 14, 2008 | at 2:15 PM |
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5 comments:
Just do what you think is best.
Jube
yes, they do eventually sleep alone. like anything, the bigger they get, the bigger they act. it just happens.
for some reason it didn't register that you were doing it for ALL sleep times. we did just wakings after we put him down for the night with Noah. I'd hold him and feed him to sleep fo the night, and then i'd put him down. the wake up and cry session after that is what we worked on. for naps i either put him to sleep in a sling or in the car. maybe cutting it down just to nightime sleep will help?
in the end, you gotta do what you gotta do. each child is unique and not everything works with every child. plus YOU are the mom and you know what's best for elle.
what ever happens, i got your back. ;)
well yes, poop does make things difficult. you wouldn't want her to be uncomfortable or even get a rash or something (NJ is infamously sensitive to poopy diapers). don't be discouraged!
i feel anxious about other things like potty training and transitioning NJ to a big boy bed, etc- I figure that by the time they're 18 and ready for college or whatever, they'll be self-feeding, self-clothing, potty trained and in their own bed. lol!
Dont give up! I know it's hard, but she doesnt start falling asleep on her own now, it will go on even when she is older. My son finally started sleeping on his own at 5. Before then, I had to lay on the floor and pretend to sleep in the same room until he fell asleep. I told myself I was doing these things to be a good mom, but I found myself resenting him for it.
If I had to do it over again (thank God I dont) I would have let him cry it out, vomiting, turning purple and all.
I feel your frustration and support whatever decisions you make. You'll get through this.
Kyung, I totally agree with you on the 18 year old thing. So I know it HAS to get better sooner or later, let's just not hope it's years later.
Jooliyah, You're so right, i'm going to ease into it and focus just on the night sleeping. What the hell was I thinking? It must be sleep deprivation.
KP, I'm starting to feel a little bit of that myself. I wish I had been a little bit more disciplined with her and not given in so much. I don't mind nursing all the time and I actually love it but with both of us tired, it makes for a hell of a day.
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