Mother of the year-NOT!!

I had a really scary experience today. I was swimming at my sister's pool and decided to have a race with my nephews and sat eleanor on the steps inside the pool and took off. when we all reached the other side of the pool, I looked back and eleanor was in the water!!! I'm not a swimmer so I couldn't swim fast enough but finally got to her. I want to cry just thinking about it now. It was so scary. She was wearing a life vest so she was on top of the water but rolling side to side so her face was in and out of the water and depending on how she fell into the pool, she could have swallowed a lot of water. I feel like the worst mom except that i don't let her get anywhere near the pool without her lifevest on even when we're just playing around the pool area.
and as soon as I got to her and got her out of the pool, she wanted to go back in to grab a toy so I guess she wasn't too traumatized. I didn't make a huge deal out of it because I dont want her to be scared of water like I have been all my life. But I will never forget the image of her fighting for air in the pool.

Thank God she's ok.

Oh plus she's been sick and had a fever for the last two days so I definitely didn't want her in the water. But because I was holding her so close in the water, I noticed that she had really dark yellow muck inside her ear which means she has an ear infection. So I probably made it worse!! Her other cousin has had severe hearing lose due to childhood ear infections and same with my FIL so I hope it's not something that runs in that side of the family. This is her first ear infection and since my nephews have been sick with the flu, I guess it's better than that which is what I thought she contracted.