So I started to let her cry it out a little. I did a bit during her naps yesterday but went in as soon as she quieted down so she knows that I'm right there and ready to take her when she calls for me instead of screaming for me. During her late nap, she cried for a little bit and stopped crying so I went in and saw her put her head down. Progress!! But she heard me coming and woke right back up. That was completely ok because I want her to know that I'm not too far away.
The ultimate test was last night. I nursed her to sleep and when she fell asleep in my arms, I put her in her bed and walked out. She woke up about 20 minutes later and started to cry. I waited and waited and after 17 minutes she went back to sleep. ON HER OWN!! I've heard stories of babies crying for hours, one friend's baby cried for 2 hours straight when they let him cry it out and there was no way I would do that. I was going to go in around 20-30 minutes and nurse her back to sleep but I didn't have to.
She slept for a solid 3 hours even with me going in to check in on her every 45 minutes or so just to make sure she was ok. When she woke up at 10:39pm, I nursed her to sleep and repeated the process. She did wake up right away but she literally let out one cry for a few seconds and went to sleep. She woke up around 2AM and again, nurse and then crib. When she woke up in the morning at 5:20AM, I brought her to bed with me thinking she was up for the morning but I nursed her back to sleep for another 2 hours.
I don't really count waking up after 5AM as part of the night sleep, so she only woke up twice during the night and that is a huge deal. More importantly, I think she's understanding that she needs to sleep on her own and doesn't need me to do it.
I just put her down for her morning nap and usually if she doesn't fall asleep after I nurse her, I'd just bring her out of her room and let her play until she passes out from being super tired. But I wanted to implement some kind of schedule with her so I just put her in her crib and told her it was nap time and although she struggled to get out of the crib, she didn't put up too much of a fight and laid down. Then I just stood over her crib and patted her belly and head until she fell asleep. She woke up and started to cry as soon as I started to leave the room but I didn't look back and even though I would normally get her and nurse her until she fell asleep in my arms, I am going to let her sleep on her own.
This is the hardest thing I have done. I'm the type of mom that runs to her side when she falls or screams for anything. But as she gets older, I don't want her to get into bad habits of staying up all night and not eating. I hope I'm doing the right thing. Where's that manual that's supposed to come with these babies of ours?
Day One
Thursday, November 13, 2008 | at 10:41 AM |
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9 comments:
Oh yeah! i'm so happy for you. Success so far. Wow. And credit needs to go to Eleanor too - she's so good! Keep at it.
When you find that manual, please let me know...I'd like a copy.
hooray! looks like it's working. i was going to comment yesterday that noah had the same trouble sleeping. i can't believe you lasted for 16 months, i was a zombie at 6 months. james finally declared that we needed to cry it out and i was too tired to argue. and like elle, it went pretty well. he cried for about 30 minutes the first night and then 15 minutes the next time, and then 5 the time after that. it made all the difference. and i agree, babies need sleep. they need to it to grow and develop. some babies need to be taught to go to sleep, and others figure out on their own. so i think you made a good choice, and i think it's even better that you're following your instincts. i'm the type to run to my babies too and rather carry them around with me all day.
I had the same issues with Kiki and now with Yoshi. I finally weaned Kiki at 21 months, and then she was better after that because she knew she wasn't getting the "mum mum." Yoshi is exactly the say way Kiki is, and I've concluded it's because we co-sleep and nurse on demand. I'm a walking zombie as it's been nearly four years that I've not had a good night's sleep. But like you, I do not believe in letting my babies cry it out. I feel like Yoshi needs the security that he is asking for and that he will outgrow it. Kiki did. And since I have the luxury of being a SAHM I am more able to accommodate them. Yoshi seems to be on the path to self weaning, so I hope that in another six months I will be able to get a decent's night sleep.
I hope E is able to keep this up and let you get some sleep. I think I am on the slippery slope of losing it. In the last month, I have found my hummus in the microwave stand cabinet, my coffee cream in the cabinet, and my sugar in the fridge. I put something in the freezer that totally should not have been there, but I can't remember what it is now.
I'm so glad that you are having a good experience! I know it's a VERY hard decision AND it's doubly hard to stick to it. Believe me, if I hadn't been practically brain-dead and almost not able to function at work, I wouldn't have done the 2 hour thing with Mason. He knew I was there though. And most of the time I was actually sitting 2 feet away from him on the floor in front of his crib. I did have to get up and walk away for a few minutes a few times though. It was bar none THE hardest thing I have EVER done, to date. He does get much better rest now that he has learned better sleeping habits, and he is so smart and loving and happy. Now that he has good habits, I'm able to go to him as soon as he cries if he wakes up, because I know he needs me.
I hope Elle continues to do well!! And you too! Good luck, hun!
Hey,
Saw your post at Kimchi Mamas and wanted to head over to say I think you're doing the right thing. We had to do a version of this at 13 months with our daughter and now she gets much better sleep and seems much happier during the day, too.
At 15 months, she now sleeps 10-11 hours at night, straight through (!!) and takes a 1.5-2 hour nap during the day. (Looking around for some wood to knock on now, so I don't jinx myself.)
Bryce was the most difficult baby and he did not sleep for the first year unless he was attatched to me! It affected not only his sleeping, but his eating too because everytime I would nurse him he would fall asleep and not get any milk. He just needed to be on me.
I finally just let him cry it out, but it was the hardest thing I have ever done. He would not give up! He would cry for HOURS, getting all sweaty and purple. The first few times he worked himself up so much that he would throw up.
Definately sooner is better. Once she is able to climb out of her crib, it will be even harder! Good job on the progress!
Thanks for all your support ladies. I did forget to credit Elle for being a little smarty and picking it up so fast. But she's one stubborn smart ass so we'll see how it goes.
"I'm the type of mom that runs to her side when she falls or screams for anything. But as she gets older, I don't want her to get into bad habits of staying up all night and not eating. I hope I'm doing the right thing. Where's that manual that's supposed to come with these babies of ours?"
I'm totally the same way - you've seen how close Na-Mi stays to me. But we ferberized at 3 months, after our ped gave us the ok - she was already sleeping 5+ hours at a time, with occasional 8+. It took 2 nights - they were hard, but worth it. I didn't enjoy it, but I believe I'm a better mother because I'm well rested. Goodness knows I can be a raging b**** when I'm sleep-deprived!
Stick with it, Eleanor will figure it quickly. And remember these days when she's a teen and you're trying to wake her up before noon... :-)
there's no one right way to do this and i think you guys are doing a great job! i'm about to read your "day two" post now...
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